Kelly Monster

Just a handful of reasons why I’m crazy about the 90’s Nickelodeon Television show: “Salute Your Shorts”

There’s the camp counselor Kevin Lee who all the campers have lovingly named “Ug.”

-”Ug-Lee! Ug-Lee! Ug-Lee!”

Then there’s the “Awful Waffle”- a camper inflicted punishment. You never actually see any camper give another camper an “Awful Waffle” but when the campers rush to fetch the ingredients used in giving one-your imagination goes wild.

“Awful Waffle” Ingredients:

-Tennis Racket

-Sand Paper

-Syrup

All I can say is- Ouch!

You never see Dr. Kahn. He is only a voice full of announcements over the intercom. His niece is also the spawn of Satan.

The show wouldn’t be the masterpiece it is without the hilarious cast of campers:

Z.Z. Ziff- Everyone’s favorite hippie

Bobby Budnick- Rule breaker, trouble maker, he’ll smuggle candy into camp for you through his successful business “Bud Mart.” Tell Ug about it and you’ll be “roasted, toasted and burned to a crisp.”

Eddie ‘Donkeylips’ Gelfen- Budnick’s sidekick. He may be the muscle of the operation but he also has a sensitive side.

Telly Radford: Michael Jordan ran when she challenged him to a “one on one.”

Sponge Harris: His brain is the size of Montana.

Dina Alexander: Poor little rich girl. Her closet looks like the inside of a Bloomingdale’s.

Michael Stein: Popular kid. All around nice guy. Bland. Was replaced by Ronnie Pinsky in the second and final season. Can you say upgrade?

I would rather not imagine my childhood without “Salute Your Shorts.” I learned valuable life lessons that shaped me as an adult.

-Never promise two different people that you will vote for them for Indian Bunk Chief.

-Never leave notes to your secret admirer where Donkeylips might find them.

-Spraying ketchup on someone else’s face gives the illusion of chicken pocks.

-And, it is possible to be crushed by dinosaurs. (collectible dinosaur stamps, that is)

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This entry was posted on Friday, September 11th, 2009 at 5:02 pm and is filed under TV Shows. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.